I’m not one to save every little thing, but I have saved a lot of the love notes Dave wrote to me in college. They were written on fluorescent orange, pink, green and yellow paper. For those of you who know my husband, that alone might make you smile. I just chalk it up to him being aflame with passion for me. Or, maybe he just got a really good deal on that bright notepaper.
Either way, I’ve got evidence. Lots and lots of evidence. The man put things in writing that I am still holding over his head twenty years later. He has no out.
For instance, after a teeny-tiny lovers’ argument, for which I apologized for over-reacting, Dave wrote, “Your emotions are like the changing seasons, every season bringing something new and wonderful.”
Not long into our marriage, the seasons weren’t so wonderful. Know what I mean? Nevertheless, I have proof. We still laugh about that from time to time.
I don’t know if people still write love notes. There’s something that seems so much more thoughtful and intentional about handwriting declarations of love and affection on paper than sending them through an email or typing them off in a text. I don’t know. Dave has sent me some sweet emails over the past few years, but I don’t treasure them as much as I do the tender cards and notes he has given me. I think part of it is the tangibility of paper. I can hold a piece of paper, tuck it into a drawer for when I want it or tape it up inside a cabinet. These sentiments are more personal for me because they are in his handwriting. They are evidence of him stopping his day, completely shifting gears and making time to love on me with his words. Dave knows I love words. He knows that I love surprises, and he knows that I love to know that I am loved.
I confess that there aren’t as many love notes being written between my husband and me as there used to be. After almost twenty years of marriage, though, there are still a few. And, what I’ve found is that I don’t need those tangible reminders as often as I used to. For one thing, Dave is still here, quietly and patiently living with me in spite of all of my weaknesses. That’s a pretty big deal these days. For another thing, I still have that file folder marked “Great Stuff” with lots of fluorescent reminders from early in our relationship as well as sweet cards I’ve saved over the years. Every few years, I get that folder out and re-read this legacy of love that my husband has left me out of the abundance of his heart. I also want our children to read these notes some day. Dave’s legacy of love to me is also part of his legacy of love to them. I never want the kids to doubt how much we love one another.
CHALLENGE: Write a love note to your spouse. Leave it in the car, taped to the bathroom mirror or wrapped around the remote–wherever they’re sure to find it. Tell them three things you love about them. Maybe you can even share one of your favorite dating memories to sweeten the deal.